SpiceBot-migrated/sopel_modules/SpiceBot_Configs/SpiceBot_DictComs/sayings/techsupport.json
2019-07-02 14:52:12 -04:00

26 lines
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JSON

{
"validcoms": ['techsupport', 'itsupport'],
"?default": {
"type": "simple",
"updates_enabled": "shared",
"responses": [
"Have you tried turning it off and on again?",
"Four! I mean five! I mean FIRE!",
"Have you tried clicking on it repeatedly?",
"No, 'any' key means push any key you like. There is no specific 'any' key.",
"Let me just remote in and... yes, that's me moving your mouse. No, I'm not a virus. You know who I am. You've met me. Oh for... stop moving the mouse while I'm fixing things!",
"Oh, you've Googled the issue yourself and tried to fix it yourself before lodging a ticket? Thanks for that.",
"Have you tried chewing the cable?",
"Instructions unclear, dick stuck in ceiling fan.",
"YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS!",
"Have you tried flinging feces at it?",
"Did you try licking the mouse? Double-lick?",
"Did you try replacing all the ones with zeros?",
"Try cooling it with a jug of water.",
"Error: Keyboard not detected. Press 'F1' to continue.",
],
},
}